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Epic Sex 


“The are no words.  It was like The Lord of the Rings and All My Children made a baby with Macho Man Randy Savage and a Whac-A-Mole machine.”

  - Bob the Skull while describing the good old days in the Faerie Realms

From Ghost Story by Jim Butcher

"I have nightmares about Hell, where all I do is add up numbers and try to have conversations with people like you."



From Vignette in Side Jobs by Jim Butcher

(via kmurphlaw)

(via dibsonbatman)

tagged as: #Bob the Skull


Bob rolled his eyelights. “It’s a semidivine immortal, Harry. It doesn’t procreate. It has no need to recombine DNA. That means that gender simply doesn’t apply. That’s something only you meat sacks worry about.”

“Then why is it that you stare at naked girls every chance you get,” I said, “but not naked men?”

“It’s an aesthetic choice,” Bob said loftily. “As a gender, women exist on a plane far beyond men when it comes to the artistic appreciation of external beauty.”

“And they have boobs,” I said.

“And they have boobs!” Bob agreed with a leer.


- This exchange brought to you by Bob the Skull and Harry Dresden from Turn Coat, by Jim Butcher. Which is awesome and you should read ALL of The Dresden Files.  (via calamitoustidings)

Harry Dresden:Bob, would you be willing to take on Evil Bob?
Bob the Skull:I'd prefer not to. I'd really, really prefer not to. You have no idea. That me was crazy. And buff. He worked out.


Epic sex?” I sputtered. “By what standards, precisely, is sex judged to be epic?”

“And tons and tons of mortal simps like you used as pawns.” Bob sighed happily, ignoring my question. “There are no words. It was like the Lord of the Rings and All My Children made a baby with the Macho Man Randy Savage and a Whac-A-Mole machine.


- Exchange between Harry Dresden and Bob the Skull. Ghost Story. (via fuckyeahharrydresden)

"Here’s where I ask why don’t you spend your time doing something safer and more boring. Like maybe administering suppositories to rabid gorillas."

- Bob the Skull. Summer Knight. (via fuckyeahharrydresden)

"you humans, you’re never satisfied. You always want to find out what’s behind the next hill, open the next box. You’ve got to learn when you know too much."

- Bob the Skull (via angerismyshieldandsword)

"that’s so typical Harry. You won’t steal a baby, but you’re too lazy to conjugate."

- Bob the Skull (via angerismyshieldandsword)

"It must be the Warden cloak. Harry, do you feel any more judgmental and self-righteous than you did this morning?"

- Bob the Skull (via angerismyshieldandsword)